Take away this hate.

Hot water burning, hot steam warming, making the room airless.

Skin reddening with each inch deeper in to the water I fall. 

Eyes closed blocking out the world.

Mind of matter, that is all it is. Mind over matter.

But still a easing relief slowly covers me.

Broken glass. Broken mirrors

Nails and screws, gripping them tightly.

Carpet burns and stony ground.

Razor blades and pocket knifes

Cutting lightly cutting deeply. 

Having no fear, only shame once the crime has been committed.

Ice cubes and lighter burns.

Paper cute and splinters.

Needles and pins.

Feel for a second.

A moment

Take away the hate, this darkness that surrounds me.
To feel something other then this num coldness.
Just for moment.
Take me away from myself.

© 2013 sarah patel

Read more at diary of depression.

"Theory Of The Crows"

© sarah patel 

Check out more of my art work at MyTheoryOfTheCrows.Blogspot.com

The Evil With In

---She stood in front of him. His eyes full of anger and hate each grasping  their weapons tightly.---

“Evil knows evil my dear”

---He said with a twisted smile---

“You’re a  pathetic thing. thinking that you can control people with fear. That you’re the embodiment of evil.”

---She walked around him. Looking him up and down. He stood rotted to the ground turning his head. Watching her. Loathing her.---

“You have no idea not a clue what true evil is. It is not something you chose or just become over time, due to circumstances. It is what you are, who you are. Its the very essence your being .

No man, not even you are can be truly evil. You can try. You can fool your self in to believing that you are the evilest thing to walk this planet, but it’s a lie.”

---she stood in front of him and looked into his eyes---

“For true evil comes from deep within, it runs through the veins thicker then blood.

For the darkest evil exists is not in you, its not in any man, for it lives in heart and sole of a woman.

Like a burning fire, raging with power. And strength, hatred.

Your not in control, you never have been. I’m the master pulling your strings, your just the marionette.”

“I’m nobody’s puppet.”

---Snapping at her---

“Oh believe me my darling, you are.”

“if you’re the puppet master where are my strings.”

---She smiled at him widely shaker her head with a silent laugh---

“don’t you get it you fool. I’m like voice in your head whispering that you are weak, telling you that they are plotting to destroy you…

 I will destroy you I‘m stronger, you don’t stand a chance you may as well give up now.”

---whispering in his ear. She stepped away from him smiling seductively. He grabbed her around the waist pulling her towards him. looking deep in to her dark emotionless tormenting eyes ---

“your more then just a voice in my head… So who are you?”

“Some one that you can trust.”

---Pushing away from him---

“If you are as wicked and evil and you say. Maybe we should work together. A union, and take this planet for ourselves instead of fighting each other ?”

---She looked at him and contemplated his offer---

“So if you are the true embodiment of evil what dose that make me?”

---She smiled at him. more so to herself. He hadn't recognized her, after all these years. His own daughter.---

©2013 sarah patel.
A random little roll-play piece.

In the wind

I stand at the top of the highest point, On its edge looking down at the flowing river below. 
In the blue sky’s above. Birds soar high among the clouds so white, that briefly hid the face of the sun like a mask at a ball.

I close my eyes, closing off everything so I can feel the cold crisp wind caressing my face and body.
I open my eyes and look once again at the river below. Flowing like blood throw veins.
But this river is not made of water blue,  nor blood but of mettle, glass, and motors. 
For this is the flowing blood of this valley of concrete and glass.
Above in the blue polluted sky’s the birds of steel fly, with their bellies full of life and dreams.

So I stand on the tallest building  looking down upon this brave new world.
With a forever changing horizon, cranes and skyscrapers. where there was once fields and forests.
The brightest thing was once the sun but now it’s the neon lights of clubs and bars. Drowning the light of the suns burning eternally in the night sky.

In the wind the memories of the past. Of what this land once looked.
The memories, the dreams of all those of who are and who were upon this rock.
In this ever changing  growing land. The wind unchanging flowing, moving throw time and space, never stopping, never slowing.

I stand gaze down and the moving red, yellow and orange lights darting around the dark veins of the city. The cold air chilling my skin as the wind rushes around my body. 
As I fall towards the ground I spread my arms as wind takes me away.
A memory. A thought. A dream. 
All ripped away and now drifting in the winds of time.

©2013 sarah patel